Satan our biggest enemy

*Take time to read.... very nice story..* 

A man woke up early in order to have his morning prayer (Subh). He got dressed, set on his way to Allahs house.

On his way to the MASJID, the man fell and his clothes got dirty.. He got up, brushed himself up, and headed home.

At home, he changed his clothes, and was, again, on his way to the MASJID.

On his way to the MASJID, he fell again at the same spot! He, again, got up, brushed himself off and headed home. 

At home he, once again, changed his clothes and was on his way to Allahs house.

On his way to the MASJID, he met a man holding a lamp. He asked the man of his identity and the man replied I saw you fall twice on your way to the MASJID, so I brought a lamp so I can light your way.

The first man thanked him profusely and the two went on their way to the MASJID.

Once at the MASJID, the first man asked the man with the lamp to come in and offer SALAAH with him.

The second man refused.

The first man asked him a couple more times and, again, the answer was the same.

The first man asked him why he did not wish to come in and pray.

The man replied, I am Satan. The man was shocked at this reply. Satan went on to explain, I saw you on your way to the MASJID and it was I who made you fall. When you went home, cleaned yourself and went back on your way to the MASJID, Allah ( s.w.t) forgave all of your sins.

I made you fall a second time, and even that did not encourage you to stay home, but rather, you went back on your way to MASJID. Because of that, Allah (s.w.t) forgave all the sins of the people of your household.

I was afraid if I made you fall one more time, then Allah (s.w.t )will forgive the sins of the whole nation (world)so I made sure that you reached the MASJID safely.

Biology JAGUARS

❤‍🔥Tayo: "Emeka, I've been pondering the ontogeny of Homo sapiens and its implications on our species' phylogeny."

❤‍🔥Emeka: "Ah, Tayo, you're venturing into the realm of molecular biology! I've been studying the morphology of Saccharomyces cerevisiae and its role in fermentation."

❤‍🔥Tayo: "Fascinating! I've always wondered about the symbiotic relationships between mutualistic organisms, like corals and zooxanthellae."

❤‍🔥Emeka: "Exactly! And have you considered the teleology of appendicular structures in vertebrates?"

❤‍🔥Tayo: "Teleology? Isn't that related to... uh... telomeres?"

❤‍🔥Emeka: "Uh, no... I think it's more about... uh... telomerase?"

❤‍🔥Tayo: "Right! Telomerase... that's the enzyme that, uh... does... stuff."

❤‍🔥Emeka: "Precisely! And speaking of enzymes, what's your take on the allosteric regulation of lactate dehydrogenase?"

❤‍🔥 :"Allosteric... regulation... hmm... sounds like... magic?"

❤‍🔥 Emeka: "Ha! Well, it's definitely not homeostasis... or is it?"

(Both students nod, pretending to understand each other, while secretly thinking, "What did I just say?")

❤‍🔥Tayo (whispering): "Guy, what am I even saying?"

❤‍🔥Emeka (whispering back): "He is not that very intelligent, he might not know what I and he are saying."

Blunders

Muhammad: "Hey, Ibrahim, I must say your perspicacious demeanor is quite efficacious in elucidating the intricacies of our syllabus."

Ibrahim: "Ah, thank you, Muhammad! Your own fastidious approach to pedagogy is truly commendable. However, I must aver that your propensity for obfuscation is rivaled only by your remarkable capacity for grandiloquence."

Muhammad: "Ha! You're being facetious, Ibrahim. But seriously, have you perused the latest addendum to our curriculum? It's replete with egregious errors."

Ibrahim: "Indeed, Muhammad. I've scrutinized it thoroughly and found it to be a veritable farrago of contradictions. But let's not be too persnickety, shall we?"

Muhammad: "Of course not! After all, as the great sage, Aristotle, once said, 'To be or not to be, that is the existential question'."

Ibrahim: "Precisely! Although, I think you mean Hamlet, not Aristotle. Nonetheless, your sagacity is unparalleled.

Muhammad: "Dude, what's perspicacious mean?"

Ibrahim: "No clue. I think it sounds cool, though."

(Both students chuckle and continue their conversation, exchanging more impressive-sounding words they don't understand.)

Jokesss

A man walked into a library and asked the librarian, "Do you have any books on Pavlov's dogs and Schrödinger's cat?"

The librarian replied, "It rings a bell, but I'm not sure if it's here or not."

The man laughed and said, "Well, that's a real paws-itive response!"

The librarian groaned and said, "You're really milking this joke, aren't you?"

The man replied, "I'm just trying to cat-ch your attention!"

The librarian face-palmed and said, "That's claw-ful!"

The man grinned and said, "I guess I've reached the purr-plexity limit!"

The librarian shook her head, laughing, and said, "You're barking up the right tree, but I think we've exhausted this joke!"

The man chuckled and said, "I guess it's time to paws for a moment!"

The librarian smiled and handed him the book, saying, "Here, take this and leaf me alone.

The magic of kindness 💖

Once upon a time, in a small village nestled between rolling hills, there lived a kind-hearted woman named Elara. Elara was known throughout the village for her generosity and warmth. She always had a smile on her face and a helping hand for anyone in need.

One chilly winter evening, as Elara was returning home from the market, she noticed a small, shivering kitten by the side of the road. Without a second thought, she scooped up the kitten and tucked it inside her warm coat. She took it home, fed it, and made a cozy bed by the fireplace.

Days turned into weeks, and the kitten, whom Elara named Snowball, grew stronger and more playfully. Snowball brought joy and laughter into Elara’s home, and the two became inseparable.

One day, as Elara was tending to her garden, she heard a faint cry for help. Following the sound, she found an elderly man who had fallen and injured his leg. Elara quickly helped him up and brought him to her home, where she tended to his wounds and offered him a warm meal.

The elderly man, grateful for Elara’s kindness, revealed that he was a wandering magician. To show his gratitude, he granted Elara a single wish. Elara, who had always dreamed of helping more people, wished for the ability to spread kindness wherever she went.

From that day on, Elara’s touch had a magical effect. Flowers bloomed where she walked, and people felt a sense of peace and happiness in her presence. The village flourished, and Elara’s kindness inspired others to be more compassionate and caring.

Snowball, always by her side, became a symbol of the magic that kindness can bring into the world. And so, Elara and her village lived happily ever after, proving that a little kindness can go a long way.

I hope you enjoyed this story! Do you have any favorite stories or themes you’d like to hear more about? 😊

The duck and the bartender😂😂

A duck walks into a bar and asks the bartender, “Got any grapes?”

The bartender, confused, says, “No, we don’t have any grapes.”

The next day, the duck walks into the bar again and asks, “Got any grapes?”

The bartender, a bit annoyed, replies, “No, we don’t have any grapes.”

On the third day, the duck walks in and asks, “Got any grapes?”

The bartender, now really irritated, yells, “No, we don’t have any grapes! And if you come in here asking for grapes again, I’m going to nail your beak to the bar!”

The next day, the duck walks in and asks, “Got any nails?”

The bartender, puzzled, says, “No, we don’t have any nails.”

The duck then asks, “Got any grapes?”

I hope this one is new for you and made you laugh! 😄 Do you have any favorite types of jokes or stories?

Comedic lesson

1. Nokia refused Android 😱
2. Yahoo rejected Google 😫
3. Kodak refused Digital Cameras 🤯

𝙇𝙚𝙨𝙨𝙤𝙣𝙨:
1. Take chances ✔️ 
2. Embrace the Change ✔️
3. If you refuse to change with time, you'll become outdated ✔️

𝙏𝙬𝙤 𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙚 𝙨𝙩𝙤𝙧𝙞𝙚𝙨:
1. Facebook takes over whatsapp and instagram 💯
2. Grab takes over Uber in Southeast Asia 💯

𝙇𝙚𝙨𝙨𝙤𝙣𝙨:
1. Become so powerful that your competitors become your allies 💪🏽 
2. Reach the top and eliminate the competition. 💪🏽
3. Keep on innovating 💪🏽

𝙏𝙬𝙤 𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙚 𝙨𝙩𝙤𝙧𝙞𝙚𝙨:
1. Colonel Sanders founded KFC at 65
2. Jack Ma, who couldn't get a job at KFC, founded Alibaba and retired at the age of 55.

𝙇𝙚𝙨𝙨𝙤𝙣𝙨:
1. Age is merely a number
2. Only those who keep trying will succeed

𝙇𝙖𝙨𝙩 𝙗𝙪𝙩 𝙣𝙤𝙩 𝙡𝙚𝙖𝙨𝙩:
Lamborghini was founded as a result of revenge from a tractor manufacturer who was insulted by Ferrari founder Enzo Ferrari.

𝙇𝙚𝙨𝙨𝙤𝙣𝙨:
Never underestimate anyone, Ever!✔️
Just keep working hard! ✔️
Invest your time wisely! ✔️
Don't be afraid to fail! ✔️

Riddles of the day

Riddle 1:

**Riddle:** I am taken from a mine, and shut up in a wooden case, from which I am never released, and yet I am used by almost every person. What am I?

**Answer:** Pencil

Riddle 2:

**Riddle:** I have keys but open no locks. I have space but no room. You can enter, but can't go outside. What am I?

**Answer:** Keyboard

Riddle 3:

**Riddle:** The more you take, the more you leave behind. What am I?

**Answer:** Footsteps

Riddle 4:

**Riddle:** What has a neck but no head, two arms but no hands?

**Answer:** A shirt

Riddle 5:

**Riddle:** I have cities, but no houses. I have mountains, but no trees. I have water, but no fish. What am I?

**Answer:** A map

Riddle 6:

**Riddle:** I can be cracked, made, told, and played. What am I?

**Answer:** A joke

Riddle 7:

**Riddle:** What comes once in a minute, twice in a moment, but never in a thousand years?

**Answer:** The letter "M"

Riddle 8:

**Riddle:** A box without hinges, key, or lid, yet golden treasure inside is hid. What am I?

**Answer:** An egg

Riddle 9:

**Riddle:** What has a head, a tail, is brown, and has no legs?

**Answer:** A penny

Riddle 10:

**Riddle:** I speak without a mouth and hear without ears. I have no body, but I come alive with the wind. What am I?

**Answer:** An echo

I hope you enjoy solving these riddles! Let me know if you'd like more.

The Great balloon Adventure

: In the whimsical town of Breezyville, where everyone travels by hot air balloon, lives a daring young girl named Poppy. Poppy dreams of exploring the world beyond her town, but her parents think it’s too dangerous. One day, she discovers an old, magical map hidden in her attic, which reveals the locations of legendary treasures scattered across the globe.

Determined to prove herself, Poppy secretly prepares her balloon and sets off on an epic adventure. Along the way, she encounters a quirky inventor named Finn, who has a knack for creating fantastical gadgets. Together, they navigate through enchanted forests, over sparkling oceans, and across towering mountains, facing challenges and making new friends at every turn.

Their journey is filled with thrilling escapades, from outsmarting mischievous sky pirates to solving ancient riddles. Poppy and Finn learn the importance of bravery, teamwork, and following their dreams. As they uncover the treasures, they realize that the true treasure lies in the friendships they’ve made and the experiences they’ve shared.

Themes:

• Adventure and exploration
• Courage and determination
• The value of friendship and teamwork

Can u speak pidgin 🤣🤣🤣

ENGLISH Vs PIDGIN 
English: if Theo walk at night, Theo might get lost
Pidgin: If Theo waka for night, THEOPHILUS
English: It will take a while before Dan arrives
Pidgin: Dangote
English: Jason started it
Pidgin: Na JASON STATHAM 
English: Its Ramsey dat knows her
Pidgin: Na RAMSEY NOAH
English: Are you videoing it? 
Pidgin: u DAVIDO am
English: Olamide is bad
Pidgin: OLAMIDE BAD OOOO
English: How did u know
Pidgin: how u TEKNO
English: He might know
Pidgin: He Phyno
English: I thought he is a girl...but hes a boy
Pidgin: I think say na girl....BURNA BOY
English: The song belongs to Sam
Pidgin: Na Samsung
English: Its David that baked it
Pidgin: Na DAVID BECKHAM
English: Selena will fart
Pidgin: SELENA GOMEZ
English: Their belly
Pidgin: Dembele
English: John is weak
Pidgin: John wick
English: Robertos car got lost
Pidign: ROBERTO CARLOS
English: it wasnt me, it was Ruth
Pidign: No be me, NARUTO
English: I dont care
Pidign: I NOKIA
English: How did you know that I told him to knock your head
Pidign: How u TECNO say ITEL am make im NOKIA head
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

RANDOM JOKES FOR THE DAY

An elderly man was on the operating table awaiting surgery to be performed by his son, a renowned surgeon. Just before they would put him under, he asked to speak to his son: "Don't be nervous, son, do your best and just remember, if it doesn't go well, if something happens to me... your mother is going to come and live with you and your wife."

It's true that exercise helps with decision making. I went for a run this morning and decided never to do that again.

 IF YOU HAVE A FAMILY THAT LOVES YOU, A FEW GOOD FRIENDS, FOOD ON YOUR TABLE, AND A ROOF OVER YOUR HEAD... YOU ARE RICHER THAN YOU THINK.

Always remember it's better to wake up and pee than to pee and wake up.

A woman places an ad in the local newspaper that reads:Looking for a man with three qualifications: won't beat me up, won't run away from me, and is great in bed.Two days later her doorbell rings. "Hi, I'm Tim. I have no arms so I won't beat you, and no legs so I won't run away." "What makes you think you are great in bed?" the woman retorts. Tim replies, "I rang the doorbell, didn't I?!?

The parrot and the burglar

A burglar breaks into a house one night. As he starts to steal the valuables, he hears a voice say, “Jesus is watching you.”

He freezes in his tracks and looks around, but he doesn’t see anyone. He continues to fill his bag with the homeowner’s possessions. Again, he hears, “Jesus is watching you.”

Terrified, he shines his flashlight around the room and finally spots a parrot in a cage. “Did you say that?” he asks the parrot.

“Yes,” the parrot replies. “I’m just trying to warn you.”

The burglar relaxes and laughs. “Warn me? Who are you?”

“I’m Moses,” says the parrot.

“Moses? What kind of people name their parrot Moses?” the burglar chuckles.

“The same kind of people who name their Rottweiler Jesus,” the parrot replies.

I hope you enjoyed this one! If you  do ,let me know in the comment section 😜🥰🥰

Jokes to brighten up ur mood 🥰🥰

Jokes:

1. Why don’t scientists trust? Because they make up everything!

2. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!

3. Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.

Riddles:

1. What has to be broken before you can use it? An egg.

2. I’m tall when I’m young, and I’m short when I’m old. What am I? A candle.

3. What is full of holes but still holds water? A sponge

4. Why don’t some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don’t work out

5. Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired.

6. What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese.

7. Why did the math book look sad? Because it had too many problems

8. Why did the PowerPoint presentation go to therapy? Because it had too many issues to slide through.

9. I was going to tell a time-traveling joke during my speech, but you didn’t like it.

10. Why did the public speaker become a gardener? Because they wanted to grow their audience.

11. Why did the computer go to the doctor? Because it had a virus!

12. Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!

13. Why did the scarecrow become a successful speaker? Because he was outstanding in his field!

14. Why did the math book look sad? Because it had too many problems.

15. Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.

16. Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired.

17. What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta!

Riddles

1. What has a face and two hands but no arms or legs?

Answer: A clock!

2. What can you catch but not throw?

Answer: A cold!

3. What is always the same but never the same?

Answer: Today and tomorrow (they are always different, but always referred to as "today" and "tomorrow")

4. What has a head, a tail, but no body?

Answer: A coin!

5. What has to be broken before you can use it?

Answer: An egg!

6. What has a thumb but no fingers?

Answer: A glove!

7. What is black and white and read all over?

Answer: A newspaper!

8. What is light as a feather but even the strongest man can't hold it for much more than a minute?

Answer: Breath!

9. What is full of holes but still holds water?

Answer: A sponge!

10. What goes around the world but stays in a corner?

Answer: A stamp!

RANDOM JOKES FOE THE DAY

People will bath with a bucket and be like I just showered my friend you just BUCKETED🤣🤣. Be specific

That moment when you were drunk the previous day and on waking up your friends tell you My guy youre really rich ooooo, I liked how you shared your salary for everyone🙆‍♀️🙆‍♀️ and also call your boss to insult him and quit your job🙆‍♂️🙆‍♂️

When you thought the food was ready but your mom comes from nowhere to add more water🙆‍♀️🙆‍♀️🙆‍♀️

Our mom used to tell us not to take food from strangers but now we order food online without knowing who cooked it🤔🤔🤔🤔

Riddles for kids and adults

Here is the list of fun riddles for children and kids:

Cartoon Riddle JokeQ: What has one head, one foot and four legs?

A: A Bed

Q: Did you hear the joke about the roof?

A: Never mind, it's over your head!

Q: How many letters are in The Alphabet?

A: There are 11 letters in The Alphabet

Q: How can you spell cold with two letters?

A: IC (icy)

Q: What state is surrounded by the most water?

A: Hawaii (this is really just a trick riddle)

Q: David's father had three sons: Snap, Crackle, and ?

A: David!

Q: If you were in a race and passed the person in 2nd place, what place would you be in?

A: 2nd place!

Q: What is the center of gravity?

A: The letter V!

Q: What English word has three consecutive double letters?

A: Bookkeeper

Q: What has a head, a tail, is brown, and has no legs?

A: A penny!

Q: The turtle took two chocolates to Texas to teach Thomas to tie his boots. How many T's in that?

A: There are 2 T's in THAT!

Q: What goes up, but never comes down?

A: Your age!

Q: What gets bigger and bigger as you take more away from it?

A: A hole!

Q: How many months have 28 days?

A: All of them!

Q: Can you spell rotted with two letters?

A: DK (decay)

Q: How many books can you put into an empty backpack?

A: One! After that it's not empty.

Q: Which weighs more, a ton of feathers or a ton of bricks?

A: Neither, they both weigh a ton!

Q: Does your shirt have holes in it?

A: No, then how did you put it on?

Q: What starts with a P and ends with an E and has a million letters in it?

A: Post Office!

Q: When does a cart come before a horse?

A: In the dictionary!

Q: What is full of holes but can still hold water?

A: A sponge!

Q: What has two hands, a round face, always runs, but stays in place?

A: A clock!

Q: Where does success come before work?

A: In the dictionary!

Q: What breaks when you say it?

A: Silence!

Q: How many peas are there in a pint?

A: There is one 'P' in a 'pint'.

The boy

Once upon a time in a certain school a teacher gave his pupils assignment on Creative Art.In their assignment, the teacher asked the students to draw anything of their choice and failing to do so will attract punishment

However on the second day,as he was examining their homework,he came across a boy whose drawing sheet was blank and he was questioned by the teacher

TEACHER: Where is your Assignment

PUPIL:Sir,I drew a grass and a goat

TEACHER: Where is the grass

PUPIL:The goat has eaten it up sir

TEACHER:Then, where is the Goat

PUPIL: Since the goat could not find more grass to eat,so it went out

BE OPTIMISTIC ALWAYS AND ALWAYS HAVE FUN

A man walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender, noticing the man looks a bit down, asks, “Hey, what’s bothering you?”

The man sighs and says, “You wouldn’t believe it. I just got fired from my job.”

The bartender, trying to be sympathetic, asks, “Oh no, what happened?”

The man takes a sip of his drink and says, “Well, you see, I worked at a calendar factory. My job was to make sure all the dates were correct.”

The bartender nods, “That sounds like an important job. So why did they fire you?”

The man shakes his head and says, “I took a few days off.”

The bartender chuckles and says, “That’s rough. But hey, at least you have a sense of humor about it.”

The man smiles and says, “Yeah, I guess you’re right. But now I’m just trying to figure out what to do next.”

The bartender thinks for a moment and says, “Well, you know what they say. When one door closes, another one opens.”

The man laughs and says, “Yeah, unless you’re in a revolving door.”

The bartender laughs too and says, “True, true. But seriously, you’ll find something. Just keep your head up.”

The man finishes his drink and says, “Thanks, I needed that. I guess I’ll just take it one day at a time.”

The bartender nods and says, “That’s the spirit. And hey, if you ever need another drink or just someone to talk to, you know where to find me.”

The man smiles and says, “Thanks, I appreciate it.” He leaves the bar feeling a little better, knowing that even in tough times, there’s always a reason to laugh.😂😂

I hope that brought a smile to your face! 🥰🥰🤩🤩🥰

THE ADVENTURE OF MR WHISKERS AND THE MISSING SOCKS

Once upon a time in a cozy little house, there lived a mischievous cat named Mr. Whiskers. Mr. Whiskers had a peculiar hobby: he loved collecting socks. Not just any socks, but the fluffiest, most colorful socks he could find. His collection was hidden in a secret stash behind the couch, where no human could ever discover it.

One sunny morning, Mr. Whiskers woke up to find his favorite sock missing. It was a bright red sock with tiny yellow polka dots, and it was the crown jewel of his collection. Determined to find it, Mr. Whiskers embarked on a grand adventure around the house.

First, he checked under the bed. All he found was a dust bunny that looked suspiciously like a tiny tumbleweed. Next, he ventured into the laundry room, where he encountered the washing machine, his arch-nemesis. With a brave heart, he peered inside, only to be greeted by a pair of old gym socks that smelled like they had been through a marathon.

Undeterred, Mr. Whiskers continued his quest. He tiptoed into the kitchen, where he found the family dog, Max, happily chewing on a bone. “Have you seen my red sock?” Mr. Whiskers asked. Max looked up, wagged his tail, and said, “Nope, but I did see something red and fluffy in the backyard.”

Excited, Mr. Whiskers dashed outside. There, in the middle of the yard, was a squirrel wearing his red sock as a hat! The squirrel looked quite fashionable, but Mr. Whiskers was not amused. He pounced, and the squirrel, startled, dropped the sock and scampered up a tree.

Triumphant, Mr. Whiskers retrieved his beloved sock and returned it to his secret stash. As he curled up for a nap, he couldn’t help but chuckle at the day’s events. Who knew that a missing sock could lead to such an adventure?

And so, Mr. Whiskers learned that sometimes, the journey is just as fun as the destination. And from that day on, he always kept a closer eye on his sock collection.

I hope this brings a smile to your face! 😊 

NELLIE ✍️✍️✍️

Brain teaser

I was born on the 25th hour of the day after Saturday but before Sunday,a month after December but before January and on the 32 day of the month.     What am I? FUTURE

It is Said that when you go to Rome,you behave like the Romans.But a confident lady goes to Rome and makes the Romans behave like her.

The richest place is not USA, not Saudi Arabia, not Cananda, but it is the grave yard because so many talents, blessings have been wasted.

In a circular house,a man died in the sitting room.         At that moment,the wife was in her room sleeping,the cook was preparing food in the kitchen,the children were in the garden,the maid was cleaning the four corners of the house, while the gate man was in the security post.     Who killed the Man?

And; THE MAID (Cause the house is a circular house)

Five riddles about greatness

1. Riddle: I am a mark of true potential and success, often sought after by leaders and heroes alike. I can inspire others and change the world, but only if pursued with dedication. What am I?

Answer: Greatness.

2. Riddle: I am often recognized when I am no longer new, and those who seek me must be prepared to fail many times. Yet, I am worth the effort for those who understand my value. What am I?

Answer: Greatness.

3. Riddle: I am the result of vision, effort, and time. I can be achieved by anyone willing to strive for more. I am not given, but earned through hard work. What am I?

Answer: Greatness.

4. Riddle: I am not born but made, and my value is judged by the challenges I overcome. Though I may be humble at first, with each trial, I rise higher. What am I?

Answer: Greatness.

5. Riddle: I am not something you can touch or see, but you know when I am present. I am often built through perseverance and a series of small victories. What am I?

Answer: Greatness.